Thursday, November 26, 2015

The advetures of Pookie Bear and Mr. Henry Gobblington IIII





What is more American than Thanksgiving? The answer is only July 4th. Thanksgiving is a true American holiday. We are the only country that celebrates it. A day where groups of people, family, and friends can put their differences aside for a day, come together have a dinner, share what we are all thankful for, and watch football. Speaking of American, football a sport that is only played in America , and we stole the name of another sport that is the most popular in the world and played in virtually every country, and has been around much longer, changed the name to soccer, and demand the rest of the world call it that too! God we are the best! Of course this holiday like most American holidays requires going completely over top in the amount of food we make and eat, and lets face it! What is more AMERICAN than Committing the deadliest sin of all?……. GLUTTONY. What is more American than celebrating the Pilgrims and Indians getting together at the same table and enjoying  a feast that was grown and hunted with their own hands. The alliance with the Wampanoag Indian tribe is one of the only examples of an Indian/ settler alliance lasting, a testament to the power of sitting down and sharing a meal with someone. Of course American history is littered with the mistreatment of Native Americans, but at least we can point that one example of something good that bred a lasting tradition. That first menu was not what we have come to expect a traditional Thanksgiving menu to look like with, lobster, dear, corn, and seal, yes SEAL!! The original Thanksgivings were to celebrate certain things, a successful harvest, the end of a long drought, etc…..etc. Although several of our early presidents declared “days of thanks” Thanksgiving was not adopted as an official holiday until 1863. Abraham Lincoln asked the country on the third Sunday of every November, at the height of the civil war to remember the fallen and to heal the countries wounds.

In the spirit of a great tradition, and adventure, I wanted to do something a little different other than the whole store bought turkey….. Blah blah blah. I thought to myself, what would be more American, on the second most American holiday then hunting my own wild turkey? The answer to that question?  Fucking nothing! Out in the woods just me and the beast, survival of the fittest! What would be more fulfilling then hunting my own dinner, if I fail? Thanksgiving cancelled! If I succeed the family rejoices drinking wine and ale in my honor! I would be looked at as the leader of the family; a statue would be built in my honor in my parent’s front yard.  People will pay me to speak at large events. The Discovery Channel will give me my own show. In the words of Eminem “Snap back to reality”. I can’t fucking  hunt! I’ve never hunted anything in my entire life…….. I lie, I accidentally shot a squirrel with a BB gun once.  If I actually owned a gun I suppose I could accidentally shoot a wild turkey? Apparently turkeys aren’t as stupid as they look though. There was a study done at Oregon State University, where they threw an apple into a group of turkeys, and they played with it as a group, kind of like football, which apparently displays some sort of intelligence. Personally if I saw a group of anything playing sports with an apple, the first thing I would think is “what a bunch of idiots”, but I also think I read somewhere that turkeys are one of the hardest animals to hunt. Well either way I think it would be a better strategy to find someone who was willing to take me turkey hunting, instead of venturing out on my own. Someone who has some experience, you know shooting a gun, and finding a turkey! So I took my search to the internet. Search “turkey hunting guide”. I turned up a lot of hunting cabins for rent, a few weekend hunting trips, but nothing that would cater to a first time hunter, third time shooter of a gun, and nothing specifically targeting turkeys. I have very little patience to begin with, in these situations, so at this point I was already frustrated. Yes after one Google search, I was ready to give up. Knowing that the first page of a Google search usually turns up just the biggest companies, and companies that pay for search engine optimization. I ventured to the second page. In this case it led me to check out local turkey farms. If I can’t hunt and kill my own fresh wild turkey, seems to me the next best option is an all natural turkey raised on a local farm……… farm fresh to the table, never frozen is, after all the way to go right? From the beginning I thought it would be hilarious to include my mother in this adventure.  1. She does love and eat turkey and other animals, but she could never kill her own food and doesn’t even want to know that it was ever alive to begin with. 2. If she ever looked dinner in the eye she would rather just die of starvation than eat it. 3. Even if she didn’t go with me I know she wouldn’t approve. By the way the picture of me an Mr. Henry Gobblington IIII is hanging on the wall at my parents house in place of one of the grand kids. My mother didn't speak to me for 3 days.

  My search lead me to the Howe Turkey Farm.The whole point of this blog was to get out and find interesting people, doing interesting things, in interesting places. I turns out this hit all three of those. Starting with an interesting family, a farm with a 70+ year history, and turkey farming is interesting, well because I haven’t the first clue what goes into it.  I contacted the Howe farm and spoke with Julie Howe. I could sense the urgency in her voice, after all I did call a week and a half prior to thanksgiving, quite possibly the busiest time of the year for a turkey farm, and here I am, clueless as to the fresh turkey buying process, and loaded with stupid questions. I knew before I called that she had better things to do then talk to me, but she answered all my questions, and when I asked if I could visit the farm, and have my picture taken with a turkey, without hesitation, said she would love for me to visit them. I set a date to visit the farm, and placed my order for our first all natural fresh turkey, which I immediately named Mr. Henry Gobblington IIII. I arrived at the farm on the rainy Thursday afternoon before Thanksgiving. At first glance it looked like a typical farm.  As soon as I got out of the a car I was a greeted by a young man I would guess between 7 and 10. He asked me if I was there to pick up. I told him I was there to see Julie and Nate, and he led me right to them. The large garage I parked next too was full of action. Adults and kids running around working hard, I felt a bit guilty for being there at such a busy time. I was greeted warmly by Julie and her mother in law  Mary Howe, who they bought the farm from after owning and operating it for 20 years. Mary was a wonderful woman full of life, and obviously still very much involved, it truly is a family farm that requires help from many family members mostly in the week leading up to the holiday, it’s almost as if the farm itself is a member of the family. Thanksgiving starts in July for this family when the first of the turkeys arrive as one day old baby turkeys. If you ask the family they will say it’s seasonal, but you can tell they are downplaying that notion. Nate joined us shortly after, in between phone calls, he informed me they were expecting a visit from the USDA the next day. This makes a stressful time of year even more so for this “part time” turkey farming family. If you click on the link I shared to the USDA regulations you will see that just keeping up with them is a full time job in itself. Especially since one violation could shut them down for the year. An occurrence like that could be impossible for a small farm like this to recover from, so everything has to be perfect. This is a full time job with a seasonal income. How can the parents of 5 kids handle such a responsibility? Nate works full time in commercial construction, so the day to day operations fall on Julie, all while home schooling the children. As I’m listening to their story I’m stressing out about finding the time to come back and pick the turkey up before Thanksgiving. I know I know pathetic on my part. The whole time I was there the whole family was beaming with pride, you can tell this was their favorite time of year.
Now I know what you’re thinking. “Sounds like a great family and great little business, but why am I going to drive an hour to go pick this turkey up, when I can get one cheaper or even free at the store?” It is more expensive coming in at $2.89 per pound. The U.S. average is $1.37 per pound. Lets look at some facts.
1.      1. Commercial store bought turkeys are pumped full of antibiotics. Is that bad? Read for yourself. (http://www.prevention.com/health/healthy-living/truth-about-antibiotics-your-meat) Some things I noticed, 23,000 people die in the U.S. each year because they are resistant to antibiotics. We are very close to living in a world where an infection in a small cut could kill us. Antibiotics are used by farmers to keep the livestock we end up eating healthy, over the years bacteria has evolved and become resistant to even the strongest antibiotics. The question is do we really need to pump our food full of antibiotics, or is that just the easiest way? Buying local all natural insures that your food has not been given an antibiotic. The key is the all natural label, if it doesn’t have that all natural seal then chances are it was given antibiotics, steroids, and probably smoked a pack of cigarettes a day. The Howe’s give their birds a probiotic as needed, and are fed a vegetarian diet where most of their protein comes from soy. I realize that buying an all natural one time a year isn’t going to change a whole lot, but maybe it just inspires you to buy all natural or organic for other things. Perhaps a local butcher?
2.      2. Buying a turkey from a major company almost ensures that it was packed into a barn where it is living on top of other turkeys constantly, and they never see the light of day. These birds are genetically engineered to only live for 5 to 8 months. So their life is simply to get as big as possible as fast as possible, but they should at least live a humane 5 months. The Howe farm raises about 4500 turkeys a year and has the space to hold even more. The first thing I saw when I pulled up to the farm was an open barn where the hens were poking their heads out checking out the scenery.  I will never be a vegetarian, but I at least know the turkey I’m eating didn’t live in complete misery.
3.     3.  It is always important to support local business! Does the CEO of Butterball really need your 40 dollars? No! does the CEO of Giant? No! Do families like the Howe’s? Yes! Look without getting into a political debate, if you buy your turkey from a major company like butterball the truth is you don’t know where your money is going. If you buy from a local farm you know for sure that your money is going right back into your local economy. If you don’t think that is important then you have a very dark soul, and you are going to hell!
4.      4. When you buy your turkey from a store, chances are that turkey has been frozen since February. That’s right the turkey you are eating today has been dead for up to 7 months. Mine has been dead since Monday. I’ll wait while you throw up your turkey…………………. Still….oh there’s more ok……………………………………  Yeah when I learned that I wasn’t happy either. Yes it’s a deep freeze, but the idea of eating something that’s been dead for months is not appetizing at all!
5.      5. It tastes better. Oh yes is does don’t you argue with me, it absolutely does. The real test will come later on. We are having two turkeys this year one store bought and Mr. Gobblington, both roasted so we will settle this debate once and for all ……………………………………………………………………………………………………………. Fast forward till 7:59pm as I’m finishing this, and yes there was a noticeable difference. The all natural turkey was defiantly moister. Yes I spell/grammar checked the word moister, and the word grammar. I used that word because I know at least half of the two people that read this threw up in their mouth a little when the read it. The flavor was better by far even mixed up with everything on the plate like we all eat our turkey you’d think it wouldn’t make a difference, it most definitely did! 
      
      Look I realize it might not be ideal for everyone to drive an hour for a turkey, and I won’t judge you if you don’t, but I will tell you this. Out of the 4500 birds the Howe’s raised this year only around 600 people actually buy them directly from the farm. Most of them go to farmers markets, and businesses who give one to their employees as a holiday gift. I’m sure you have a local farmers market near you? It is totally worth the extra money I promise you and again now you are supporting several local businesses. In my experience with sales, people tend to buy from people they have a connection with. I do encourage you to do what I did this year, because after I met the Howe family as cheesy as this sounds I felt a little bit of the pride they had raising, while I was eating it. If anything came from this, it’s that they defiantly earned a new yearly customer. I will be one of the 600+ to drive to the farm and pick up my turkey every year.
Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I hope it was as delicious as mine, but I know it wasn’t because again your Turkey has been dead and frozen for 7 months. Mine was dressed on Monday.
We will be The Brinton lodge on the 28th and I’ll have a post about the 10 commandments of beards as well.
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